Cowboy Baby Daddy by Hamel B. B
Author:Hamel, B. B.
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-09-09T16:00:00+00:00
10
Connor
Eventually we get dressed and have to go inside. I almost don’t want to let her go but I know I gotta. She goes to bed and I retreat into my own room, my mind still on that body, my cock already half hard again.
Fucking hell, I don’t know how she does it. I feel dizzy, under a spell or something. I haven’t felt like this in a very long time. I haven’t let myself feel like this or anything even remotely like it.
I’ve had women since I came out here. One-night stands, brief little flings, never anything more than that. I never got close, never let myself get into a position where I could get hurt or do some hurting. I did enough hurting for everyone back in the day.
I can remember the sort of shit I pulled when I was in the NFL, high on life, thinking I’m better than the fucking world. I’d fuck a girl one night, tell her that I love her, and never call her again. I’d call that a normal Tuesday night.
I’d sleep with a girl and her sister in one day. I fucked a pair of twins one time and promised to send them season tickets, but never did. Shit, that was fucked up. I did worse, so much worse, and after a while it all started to blend together until all I could do was hate myself.
It was toxic, the whole place. I was my worst self, doing the most heinous shit imaginable just because I could. And when I hit rock bottom that second season, I knew I had to get out.
After that, I didn’t trust myself anymore. I knew what I was capable. I could do fucked-up things to people, to women, to real human beings, just because I could.
So I shut myself off. I didn’t let myself become that guy again. If I found myself wanting a woman beyond a completely mutually agreed upon one-night thing, I’d cut her off completely. I couldn’t do that again. I just couldn’t.
Now though, I feel like all those dammed-up emotions are flooding out. All that pent-up desire is suddenly breaking free and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
It’s just because it’s been so long. It’s because what I feel for Holly is different somehow, more intense. It’s more real.
It’s something I can’t just ignore.
I go to sleep thinking about her and wake up early thinking about her. Since it’s a Sunday, everyone’s awake and cooking our usual Sunday morning breakfast. I come out into the kitchen, grab some coffee, and pitch in wordlessly.
I’m so distracted by my thoughts of Holly that I don’t notice the comments and looks from the others until it’s too late.
“You know, I heard the horses got spooked last night,” Faye says to me softly.
Tina snickers and tries not to laugh.
I frown at her. “What happened?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I think some kind of animal got into that barn.”
“That’s not good. If there’s a break in the wall, we gotta patch it up.
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